Fantastic Men In Black II Movie Quotes & Dialogues (2002)

Men in Black II Movie Quotes

Read Some Most Popular Men In Black II Movie Quotes and Sayings. We Collect Some Most Famous Quotes From The Men In Black II Movie. You Can Also Read and Share These Quotes With Your Friends and Love Ones.

Great Men In Black II Movie Quotes




Agent J: Jeff, excuse my partner. He’s new and he’s [Jeff attacks T] kind of stupid.
Note : Will Smith as Agent J

Agent J: [J has just saved a whole subway of passenagers from being eaten alive by Jeff, the giant worm-like alien, who chewed off a half of the subway train before retreating]
[Neuralizes subway passengers]
Thank you for participating in our drill. Had this been an actual emergency, y’all woulda been eaten. ‘Cause you don’t listen. You ignorant. How a man gon’ come bashin’ thru a subway win– That’s the problem with all y’all New Yorkers. “Oh, we seen it all.” “Oh no! A 600 ft. worm! Save us, Mr Black Man!” And I come in, I ask ya nice move to the next car! Y’all just sit there like…
[Neuralizes subway passengers again]
Thank you for participating in our drill. We hope that you enjoyed our new, smaller, more energy-efficient subway cars. Watch your step, you have a nice evening. [walks off, neuralizing Capt. Lawrence Bridgewater, MTA in the process]
Note : Will Smith as Agent J

Agent J: [after Frank the Pug suggests the “good cop, bad cop thing”] How about we do the good cop, dumb dog thing, and you just shut up?
Note : Will Smith as Agent J

Agent J: Jeff, I am so not in a mood for you! Get back in the subway! Right now!
Note : Will Smith as Agent J

Agent J: I will lay the smackdown on your candy ass! (In homage to The Rock)
Note : Will Smith as Agent J

Agent J: Yeah, every Saturday night you’d be like, “Flush me J. Flush me.” and I’d be like, “Naw.”
Note : Will Smith as Agent J

Popular Men In Black II Movie Quotes

Agent K: I never worked in a funeral home. Something I can do for you, Slick?
Note : Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K

Agent K: Get a mop, and escort all civilian personnel from this site immediately.
Note : Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K

Serleena: Silly little planet. I could rule the place with the right set of mammary glands.
Note : Lara Flynn Boyle as Serleena

Laura: An hour ago, a man I’ve known my whole life vanished in front of my eyes because of a woman with things coming out of her fingers and a two-headed guy with the IQ of a cannoli. So yeah, everything’s okay.
Note : Rosario Dawson as Laura Vasquez

Laura: When we’re kids, before we’re taught how to think, or what to believe, our hearts tell us there is something else out there. I know what I saw. You tell me what I’m supposed to believe.
Note : Rosario Dawson as Laura Vasquez

Frank the Pug: (upon seeing a dead man’s skin only) Hey, J, zero percent body fat!
Note : Tim Blaney as Frank the Pug

Worms: Once you’ve had worm, it’s what you’ll yearn!
Note : Drew Massey as Worm Boy

Michael Jackson: I could be Agent M.
Note : Michael Jackson as Agent M

Grand Central Station Locker Creatures: K is back! The light keeper! All hail K! All hail K! Oh K can you see by the dawn’s early light…

Jeebs: (head is growing back after J shot it off) Oh, great, right in the pie-hole! Now nothing’s gonna taste right!
Note : Tony Shalhoub as Jack Jeebs

Nice Men In Black II Movie Quotes

Doorman: (after J and K come to stop Serleena, he’s reading a tabloid that says “Satan Escapes from Hell.”) About time you got back. That pretty lady in there is causing all kinds of hell.

Dialogue:
Frank: [singing “I Will Survive”] “… and I learned to get along, and so you’re back from outer space, I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face, I should have changed that stupid lock, I should have made you leave your key, if I had known for just one second you’d be back to bother me, go on, now go, walk out the door…”
Agent J: Frank! Bring your head in this window before before I roll it up in there.
Frank: [Sits further away from the window] Got it! [Starts humming the melody, looking anxiously out the window]
Agent J: FRANK!!
Note : Tim Blaney as Frank the Pug and Will Smith as Agent J

Best Men In Black II Movie Quotes

Dialogue:
MIB Customs Agent: Any fruit or vegetables?
Serleena: [motioning towards Scrad] Yeah, two heads of cabbage.
Zed: How’d it go?
Agent M: The door-locks are gone and the treaty is signed.
Zed: Good work.
Agent M: Zed? What about that position you promised me in Men In Black?
Zed: Still working on the Alien Affirmative Action Program, I’ll keep you posted.
Agent M: Wait a minute, that’s not what you promised me!
Zed: You’re- you’re breaking up!
Agent M: Zed? Hello? I can be Agent M!
Agent J: Wait, what are you doing?
Agent K: I always did the drivin.
Agent J: Oh, no.
Agent K: I remember that.
Agent J: No, what you remember is that you used to drive that old busted joint. See, I drive… the new hotness.
[pointing at Kay]
Agent J: Old and busted.
[pointing at himself]
Agent J: New hotness.
[K looks at J for a second, then J hands the keys over]
Agent J: Old, busted hotness.
Note : Nick Cannon as MIB Autopsy Agent, Lara Flynn Boyle as Serleena, Rip Torn as Chief Zed, Michael Jackson as Agent M, Will Smith as Agent J and Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K

Dialogue:
[about the driver-shaped airbag]
Agent K: Does that come standard?
Agent J: Actually it came with a black dude, but he kept getting pulled over.
(Note: Will Smith improvised this line, which the producers liked so much they added it to the theatrical trailer)
Note : Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K and Will Smith as Agent J

Motivating Men In Black II Movie Quotes

Dialogue:
Agent K: You didn’t see a room full of weapons or four alien nightcrawlers. You will love and cherish each other for the rest of your lives.
Agent J: Which could be the next 27, 28 minutes, so get to the loving and cherishing. Oh, and she can stay up late as she wants and can have cookies, candy, and cakes and stuff.
Note : Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K and Will Smith as Agent J

Dialogue:
Agent J: (J is hiding Laura at the Worms’ place) Here’s my communicator. You’ll be safe here.
Worms: (Laura kisses Jay) Whooooh!
Agent J: Uh… just… watch out for Neeble.
Laura: Which one’s Neeble?
Agent J: Um… err… which one o’ y’all’s Neeble?
Neeble: Yo, mama!I’m Neeble.
Agent J: Ah, there ya go. And… uh… don’t fall asleep.
[Jay exits]
Worms: Twister!
Agent J: Didn’t your mother give you a Gameboy!!??
Agent K: WHAT IS A GAMEBOY!!!!?
Note : Will Smith as Agent J, Drew Massey as Worm Boy, Rosario Dawson as Laura Vasquez, Thom Fountain as Neeble and Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K

Dialogue:
Agent K: When you get sad it always seems to rain.
Laura: Lots of people get sad when it rains!
Agent K: It rains because you’re sad baby.
Note : Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K and Rosario Dawson as Laura Vasquez

Dialogue:
Agent J: So Laura is Princess Laurana’s daughter. [turns to K] Did y’all…?
Agent K: MIB’s a mess. Let’s go.
Note : Will Smith as Agent J and Tommy Lee Jones as Agent K




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